My wife Meagan is all done with her back surgery. She did wonderfully the doctor just reported. She had a piece of herniated disc that had broken off and was binding up the nerve causing the pain going down her leg from when she was rear ended in a wreck. It was no wonder she was in pain, he said. He got the piece out of there and she should heal up great. Thanks for your prayers and letting me share.
I needed to get those tears out this morning on the 8am men’s Zoom meeting. I appreciate you guys being there and holding space. All of my old tools are not there anymore…no acting out sexually for the last 11 months, no over-working to escape, no obvious sugar (cake, candy, or ice cream) in 1 yr and 8 months, no social media scrolling or watching news in 600 days, no credit card spending or debting or overspending in 5 mths and 29 days….I have to feel these emotions and that is ok, just for today. Today I have so many NEW tools in my tool box.
No need to escape in harmful behavior today. I surrendered to my Higher Power, talked to my sponsor, shared multiple times about it in meetings…just like you guys taught me. What’s cool is that I had my gratitude list, affirmation list, prayer list and fear list, plus the 8am zoom to help fill my time in the hospital lobby. While I was alone and scared, I was not really alone.
I updated my numbers spreadsheet like they taught me in DA, stayed present, tried not to project out into the future. I took the day off of work (instead of overworking) so I can focus on taking care of scared, anxious little Matt and my wife who needs me to be present today…and I’m so glad I did. I think it was ‘the next right move’.
To God be the glory. These are the promises of recovery and they are coming true for me. Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly…but they will always materialize if I work for them. Meagan is healing well and is walking around slowly today. I’m grateful for the surgeons and the attendants, the hosipital and my mom for watching our daugter. I’m grateful for Katie who brought over some heathy meals and for my mother-in-law who made us a wonderful soup for dinner last night. Thanks to all.
